


Teamwork

by nitohkousuke



Category: Zyuden Sentai Kyoryuger
Genre: F/M, Getting Together, M/M, Multi, Souji learns how to be part of the team
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-12
Updated: 2018-08-18
Packaged: 2019-06-09 10:13:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15265275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nitohkousuke/pseuds/nitohkousuke
Summary: Because he didn’t understand feelings. He didn’t understand the longing, clawing feeling in his stomach. He didn’t understand the way his heart twisted when someone paid more attention to someone else. When he felt constantly like he didn’t belong or he wasn’t good enough. When he longed to make people smile. To have their attention on them. To be good enough to wield that battery. To wield the Gaburevolver.Souji learns being part of a team is more than just what's on the battlefield.Technically a Sequel to Hormones, but can be read stand alone.Ships to be added as chapters are added, but expect this to be a OT6.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I apologize in advance as I can't figure out what tone this story is going to have in the end. I can only write angst and crack

His mind was swirling. His heart was like static and wire and confusion bubbling between the gaps of not knowing or understanding. So, Souji found himself doing exactly what he always did when he felt like that. His hand wrapped around his bokken behind his back. Slash. Step. Slash. Frantic and desperate. This was the thing he understood. The thing he got. This was who he was.

But people? People were difficult. Confusing. Emotions were even more difficult. They made his head spin and his heart twist and all of his confidence drain from his body. If then he tried to think about emotions towards people, Souji was at such a loss that it made him incredibly frustrated. He didn’t like to be stuck. He didn’t like to feel like he couldn’t do something, especially due to inexperience or lack of knowledge. And usually, when something like that came up...Souji practiced or trained or studied.

But this wasn’t something he could do any of that with. That alone made him want to scream.

Because he didn’t understand feelings. He didn’t understand the longing, clawing feeling in his stomach. He didn’t understand the way his heart twisted when someone paid more attention to someone else. When he felt constantly like he didn’t belong or he wasn’t good enough. When he longed to make people smile. To have their attention on them. To be good enough to wield that battery. To wield the Gaburevolver.

After hours upon hours of training, partially due to the fact that his father had been home nonstop and not only could Souji barely hear himself think sometimes, but there was no room or time to deal with his other issues and between his anxiety and his hormones and his general lack of emotional intelligence Souji was at a loss of how to deal with anything besides wearing himself down constantly so he doesn’t snap at everyone, Souji found himself lying down on the floor one hand on his sword. His other hand pulls out the Zakutor battery, running his fingers over the side.

“...Why did you pick me? I’m just….” A dumb kid. He doesn’t fit in with the Kyoryugers at all. And his stupid feelings...his stupid hormones are just making everything worse. Because he already constantly wondered if he was worth anything to the team. But now? Now, his brain swirls with ideas about being closer. About wants and desires and touches and feelings and….Souji has no idea if he even deserves anything like that. And besides, he’s just some dumb kid.

“….I’d ask you for advice...” He runs his fingers down the side of the battery again. “...But I’m not really sure you’re versed in this...”

Sitting up, Souji brushes his bands just out of his eyes, debating with himself. He could continue to ignore this, but really that might just blow up in his face. Or...he could ask for help.

Souji hated asking for help. But the last thing he wanted was his stupid teenage hormones to get in the way of his job as a Kyoryuger…

So. Help it was.

 

 


	2. I guess they're really doing that.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Souji goes to ask Amy for advice. Ucchy is the last person he'd expect to be there.

Out of all the Kyoryugers, there was one that Souji felt would be the best choice to ask for advice from. Amy. There were a lot of reasons why Souji would go to Amy first. There were a lot of reasons he’d rather not go to anyone else first. Embarrassment mostly. Though, asking for help at all on this subject was…mortifying. But this is what had to be done. He had to deal with this.

Though perhaps 11pm was a poor choice to sneak out of his house and go seek advice. Then again, if he went during the day he ran the issue of Amy being busy or the others being involved. Honestly, the only issue with seeing Amy at this time was her not being awake or Gentle. Souji had snuck into Amy’s house a few times in the past at night to help her with something or just because...it was a rough night. Sneaking past Gentle through her balcony was an easy task.

But first..

_If you’re awake, I need some advice. I’ll bring snacks from the Family Mart._

Which perhaps Family Mart at 11pm was also a bad decision for a high school student. But out of uniform and far enough away from his house..and maybe in a hat and a hoodie, there was no way he would be recognized. Just like the time he’d bought….things. Or the time he tried to sneak into the sex shop. He’d actually got into there, but chickened out last minute after staring an entire wall of dildos. One day he’d go back into there...maybe he wouldn’t go alone. He could maybe manage that.

Checking his phone as he handed out his money to the cashier, Souji frowned noticing that his message was still unread. Amy did go to bed a little earlier, but she had been complaining about schoolwork...she should still be awake. Worse comes to worse he wakes her up and then offers her his weight in strawberry pocky as a peace offering. It wouldn’t be the first time he’s done that. And really he should let her sleep...but he needs to do this while he still has the courage.

Taking a few back roads and sneaking past her security system in a way that makes him want to maybe let Gentle know if only for Amy’s safety, though she could protect herself fine, he makes it to in front of her balcony before checking his phone again. Her lights are on, but his message is still unread. That sends a wave of panic through him. She’s never ignored him before...but...fear collects in the pit of his stomach and he wonders if maybe...he should go back. He could give the snacks to her tomorrow and pretend this whole thing didn't happen.

No. He has to do this. So he takes a breath, he shoves his anxiety away somewhere to work out with swords later, and he climbs up to Amy’s balcony. The door is unlocked as it always is, mostly so people can do exactly what he’s doing. But there’s no sound-

“A-amy-dono….” A moan catches Souji’s ears. There’s no doubt who that is, and Souji is left frozen in place right outside the open door. “Shhhh. Gentle will hear you. You don’t want that, do you?” Oh god. Souji takes a deep breath and tries to process the information that he’s just received. Ucchy is in Amy’s room late at night. That was very definitely a moan. Amy told him to be quiet so they don’t get Gentle.

Maybe this is like one of those romance comedy manga that he’s been borrowing from Amy. Maybe, Amy was just doing something that made Ucchy make some kind of inappropriate sound. Ucchy is just like that sometimes. Asking to be quiet for Gentle made sense. It was late, and no one was allowed in the room. Really, it was just that. Souji would peek and realize his error. They could laugh about this later.

Souji leaned into the room to get a look at Ucchy in Amy’s bed, hair out of its ponytail. His face was flushed as he let out another quiet whine. He was completely naked and from this angle Ucchy couldn’t see him, but Souji could however see his….sword. His sword that was completely unsheathed. Hard and ready.

This was already a lot, and really, by itself it was enough to make Souji leave and pretend he never saw this. However, just to the left and in front of Ucchy, was Amy. Amy would was completely naked sans a piece of black leather he never knew she owned, and in her hand was a dildo that was honestly bigger than anything he’d even dreamed of using. Not that he had dreaming of using them. Not that he had dreamed of Amy using them on him. No. He’d never.

There was two options here. Souji could leave and pretend this never happened. Souji could stay here and continue watching and then leave and pretend this never happened. Or he could disrupt them and die of embarrassment on the spot. The last third option was obviously not an option. The first one was obviously the best choice.

Amy took a few steps forward. The leather clung to her ass and cut off to reveal her legs, that sure Souji saw everyday, but in this light in this motion….he shifted slightly. As she leaned over, he caught a glimpse of her…..breasts. He’d never seen Amy’s...he’d never seen real girl breasts before literally ever. He’d figured he wouldn’t care because he was gay right? But the slight movement was enough to make Souji feel dirty for looking but want more.

Ucchy himself was a sight to see, and Souji had had countless fantasies about this scene. Maybe slightly different. But still.

“Tell me what you want.” Amy purrs out, and Souji has read enough Yaoi to know where this is going. Though this isn’t Yaoi he guesses. Ucchy lets out a whine as he pushes himself against her. “I w-want whatever you want, Amy-Dono.” And Amy lets out a giggle. “Wow! You’ve lasted this long and still such a gentleman!” And with that Amy must have started to press the dildo into him because Ucchy lets out a hiss and a whine and Amy leans in to catch his lips to quiet him.

How long has this been going on? How is Gentle so bad at his job?

Souji finds that his hand is already palming the front of his pants, and he’s hard enough that it’s going to be difficult to get down. But he has to leave. He can’t be here when they finish, and really being this much of a voyeur is already…

His mind is swirling as he very carefully climbs back down the balcony. Quickly, he looks at his fond and sends some of the cute Line stickers he and Amy send back and forth.

_Nevermind. I figured it out. I’ll give you the snacks tomorrow anyway. I’m sure you need them._

Amy and Ucchy are...fucking. Amy was the one fucking Ucchy. Really that’s not the confusing part. Ucchy is having sex with a girl. He never for a moment would have thought he was into girls. After all, didn’t he with his past lord…? Though, maybe he was bi. That made sense.

...Maybe if he was really quiet he could deal with his issue before bed.

But as he got home and saw his father’s study light on...he realized he couldn’t

Seeking help just made things worse and he still couldn’t do anything….

 

That was fine. He’d just train more tomorrow. There was no reason to get anyone involved. It was just dumb teenage hormones. Right?


	3. So this is what they do when he's at school

Never before has Souji been so...upset? By the lack of Deboss. Training was something to ease his nerves that’s true, and training without anyone around was definitely something that helped him deal with things without anyone poking at him. There had been a lot of that recently, especially since Souji had started to maybe train himself into the ground. But it was the only way to keep himself….somewhat together. A little snappy maybe, but...this was all a part of growing up wasn’t it? He was just some stupid kid. Isn’t this what they expected of him? After all even if Souji was more mature than other high school students, he was one of them. He still had a lot to figure out.

Though, he wasn’t sure about the mature part right now considering he’d skipped his entire afternoon classes and all of his clubs. Rin would probably have his ass for this, which really...he’d rather be here than her constant worrying anyway…He felt terrible whenever he snapped at her. He felt terrible for snapping at anyone really.

So hopefully, he could train here at a time he was never here. He could piece out his thoughts. After all, Amy had class and Ucchy...hopefully wouldn’t be here so he wouldn’t have to think about them. Nossan was working, so even though Souji had considered talking to him, he could practice his sword work without any of his worrying either.

Really, his plan was to train himself into the ground as he tried to decide whether he should talk to Ian, to king, maybe to Nobu, or maybe he should just give up and resign to this new normal. The last one probably was the worst option. But what was he supposed to do? Ask King for help on relationships and emotions and hormones? How would he even start that conversation? Would King understand this whole thing? Well of course he would, but also could Souji make those words into a sentence without exploding? Probably not. And what was his other option? Ask Ian how to deal with his hormonal urges? Ask him to...Souji’s cheeks heated. Would he even take him seriously? Sure, Ian flirted with him, but Ian flirted with the entire team. That left a weird sort of hot and cold and fuzzy and nervous feeling in his stomach. Because Ian was just like that. He shouldn’t take that seriously because Ian wasn’t fucking the whole team, right?

The second Souji beams into the spirit base...the first sound that he hears is a whine that for a moment maybe sounds like Ian. Maybe. But its not the sort of sound he has ever expected to hear from him. For a moment, Souji thinks maybe he’s just lost it. Right? He hasn’t been sleeping well. He has a lot of pent up energy. His brain might have just finally gone. Maybe. Maybe its a Deboss. Yeah, a voice Deboss. They’ve infiltrated the base. That’s totally possible.

It’s not.

Souji knows it not.

So he takes a few steps towards where he trains, and curses that of course this is happening there because the universe is just out for him at this point, and when he gets just close enough to catch a glimpse, he hears a growl...that sounds a lot like King. His whole body turns to pins and needs and he’s not sure what exactly his everything is doing but it’s a lot and Souji would like to just leave and pretend this isn’t happening. Because he’s not sure what’s happening and he’s not sure he wants to know more. He does. He does actually a lot.

That’s why he takes a few steps to just be able to see the scene before him without getting caught. Though honestly, the two of them are far too involved to even know that he’s there. Which is good. Souji can’t deal with that on top of this. Because this is.

Ian is being held up against the wall. He’s completely naked, and in fact all of his clothes are just….thrown across the floor on a path to the wall. So are King’s for that matter except for his necklace and actually judging by the hands in King’s hair, so are all of Ian’s rings.

Ian is flushed and the sounds coming from his mouth remind him of Ucchy. And really the memory of Ucchy being fucked side by side with this scene makes Souji feel like he’s on fire. He’s not sure what kind of fire, but it’s definitely fire. All of his dreams of Ian, yes he’ll acknowledge there are a lot, have never had him in this position...but really, Souji can’t say he’s against it. Though, he doubts he’d ever had the opportunity to be in King’s position.

And on that matter…..The sculpt of King’s body as he moves as he let’s out a laugh and says something that Souji can’t quite hear because there’s no blood in his ears anymore besides the sound of more emotions than Souji has ever been prepared to feel at the same time…..King is gorgeous. There are a few bite marks in places, some of which are definitely old. The amount of times he’s been shirtless, Souji is surprised he’s never noticed. But it’s not like he’s been looking for that sort of thing. The bits of Ian’s skin he can see are also littered in bite marks.

They’ve been at this awhile then.

How has he not noticed?

But really? What is this? King is King. And he’s just. He’s King. Souji doesn’t have words to describe how or why King does what he does. It’s just how he works. This is entirely in his character. And Ian is Ian. And Souji has a few more words for that and that’s well...also this is entirely not surprising. Well, Ian’s current position is surprising. But this general sort of thing isn’t.

And does that mean? Does that mean that all of their flirting and possible advances...are those real? Are they really flirting with him? Does this mean Souji could have been doing this this whole time? He could be the one fucked into the wall of the spirit base? He could be the one fucking someone into the wall in the spirit base? He could be the one sandwiched between them. Maybe King could fuck Ian while Souji sucked his dick or maybe the reverse or maybe the two of them could fuck him. Maybe even.

There’s a cry, and Souji finds that at that moment is hand is in his pants, he’s harder than he’s ever been, and if he doesn’t leave the spirit base immediately he’s going to have to deal with way more than he’s even remotely equipped for.

So Souji leaves as quickly and quietly as possible. He finds a park that’s mostly deserted in a place that no one will notice him and report him for not being in class. And the second he’s alone, he falls on his face and screams, quietly enough to not draw attention, into the grass.

Because who is he kidding? Ian and King? Fuck him? He’s just some stupid high school student. There’s no way there’s any real intention. King is just King. Ian is just Ian. They’re just like that. They’re just being nice. Or they’re just teasing. There’s no real drive in that. There’s no real interest.

Ian and King are fucking. Amy and Ucchy are fucking. Everyone on this team is fucking without him, and he’s left odd man out because he’s a stupid high school with the emotional intelligence of a rock. And to be fair half of that is entirely his fault because maybe he could use his words and actually ask for help and deal with his problems instead of hitting things with his sword and avoiding all of issues even when he lectures the others on doing the exact same thing. But also, everyone on this team is fucking but him and Nossan and this has to have been happening for forever and is Souji more mad that he hasn’t noticed or that he hasn’t been able to masturbate in over a week and everyone else in the team is getting laid and he’s both jealous but also interested and excited for them and-

Oh Nobu isn’t getting laid either.

Souji rolls over on his back and stares up at the sky. He could ask him about how to deal with that. Right? Maybe that’ll go better.

After all, the chances of him walking in on Nossan fucking someone was zero. Finally, he could deal with this issue and his life would be one step less like a drama.

But, as Souji sat up and stared over the horizon, he decided that could wait a day or so. After all, he could just make it to Kendo club. There he could train himself into the ground or until Rin made him take a break.

But after that.

He was finally going to deal with this.

Hopefully.


	4. No one actually believes Nobu is a bachelor. Have you seen the man?

It had taken a few days for Souji to finally decide that he was going to talk to Nobu. Because really, the degree of trash fire he had hit lately was absolutely…Even though he’d actually finally gotten a chance to deal with...issues, he hadn’t felt any better. Actually, he’d felt worse because his mind played everything he’d seen over and over and he wasn’t sure if he felt bad because they didn’t know he was there or bad because he felt jealous or bad because he was so into everything that he saw that he didn’t know what to do about it. Maybe all of it.

Souji had been one of the least pleasant people to be around in the past few days, and sure that had benefited him while fighting the Deboss because he was more fierce than he’d ever been but he’d gotten a stern talking to about his attitude issues and lack of team work and even a comment from Torin about how not very Brave he was.

And really who was Torin to judge him on that? What did Torin know about hormones?

….You know, Souji never wanted to know the answer to that question.

But really, he was just having normal teenage boy issues. He’d get some adult advice, and he’d learn how to deal with it. And then he could go back to only being mildly prickly. All will be well in the world and everything can return to normal. Though, Souji wasn’t certain he wanted everything to return to normal. Maybe he wanted more. Maybe he wanted a lot more.

But for now. For now, he made his way to Nossan’s house after school. Sure, he was skipping Kendo today, and he was going to get an earful. But really, this was the only time he knew in Nossan’s schedule that he was free for the next couple of days that wasn’t team time.

Nossan was the obvious choice to talk to. After all, he’d been a bachelor for forever. He’d be able to give him all the advice on how to control hormones like a normal human being and he could maybe not be a disaster and all could be well and maybe his day dreams would still be above a pg rating but at least they could maybe be contained. Maybe. Hopefully.

So Nossan’s house it was. Finally, he’d get to walk into someone’s house without someone fucking. And he could talk about his emotions. And he could ask about real things. Finally, everything was going to work out.

Maybe, if Souji’s luck score was a little higher, maybe that would be his life. Because he thought that Nossan couldn’t be fucking anyone because there’s all the jokes about him being a bachelor. But really.

Souji's fist nearly meets the door when he hears what sounds like Nossan. It sounds like Nossan and there’s a tone and strain in his voice that Souji pauses and thinks. Maybe this time. Maybe this time it really is a Deboss. Not that he wants Nobu to be attacked in his own home. He really doesn’t deserve that. But also. Souji has absolutely no idea who he could be fucking if that really is what is happening.

“Oh my~” If Souji was carrying anything, he would have dropped it. His fist still hovers above the door as he is frozen in place. Because that’s...that’s.

Yeah okay, Ian is fucking Nossan too. He’s not too surprised about that. Ian really is probably fucking the whole team. The whole team minus him.

There’s an inside voice that chides him that maybe that last sentence wouldn’t be true if he actually had some self-confidence and acknowledged that maybe he did have interest in him and maybe he could have also gotten the chance to get on his knees and--

King’s laugh cuts his thoughts hard, following a series of sounds that he can only just barely hear but at this point Souji's seen and heard enough people fucking that he knows exactly what’s going on. Well, not exactly because he’s never seen three people fuck at the same time, but it’s got to be in the same ballpark.

Not only is Nossan most definitely fucking. He’s fucking both Ian AND King. Which. Neither truly surprises him. Ian is Ian and King is King. And Nossan is an extremely lucky man really. And honestly, with his fist still poised over the door, the image of Nossan just sweaty enough that his clothes sticks to the outline of his body...There was no way Nobu wasn’t fucking someone with how gorgeous he is.

What should he do? What is he supposed to do? They’re all...they’re all. Everyone on this team is having sex but him. And not only that but he knows absolutely nothing about it. It’s not like he has to know when everyone is fucking, but to not even know they were involved at all. To be withheld information like this, Souji can feel his eyes leak ever so slightly and his chest hurts. His skin goes cold and his hand is frozen in place. His whole body is frozen in place. Because what is he supposed to feel? What is he supposed to do? It’s not like he doesn’t want this for them. They all deserve this ten times over. But…

But is it really so selfish to want to be involved? Because, he’s already always felt like the odd one out. He’s the youngest. He’s the one with his life not even remotely put together. Because sure, Amy is still in school, but she has her whole life more or less mapped out. What does he have? Taking over his father’s dojo? Yeah, maybe if he’s good enough. And really, he doesn’t know if he is.

What is Souji to this team? What is he to them? Not that fucking is everything in a relationship because it isn’t. Because the fact that he hasn’t…..done things….doesn’t mean that their fighting, their bravery, their friendship….that all of that isn’t important. It is. But...what is he doing.

A moan cuts his thoughts in half. King’s moan. And a laugh from Ian. And some kind of comment from Nossan to be more careful. And Souji finds that the fire in his stomach is way too intense compared to the cold feeling that settles everywhere else.

….So he presses his ear against the door and listens. And it’s only a minute or two that he hears what sounds like Nobu cumming before he realizes that he needs to leave. Because this is rude and inappropriate and he’s not the kind of person who’s going to spy and masturbate to someone else when they aren’t even aware of what he’s doing. Because that’s...that’s a betrayal of their trust. Because he’s better than that.

And also, there’s a rustle of feet and clothing that makes Souji realize that if he doesn’t move soon and one of them leave, he’s going to have to answer questions he doesn’t want to.

It’s fine. He’s just….

He’s going home.


	5. THIS IS A PUBLIC SPACE GUYS

Day pass by where Souji’s not really sure how he feels or how he’s supposed to feel. School has become a distraction at least as teachers are starting to crank out more school work, and there’s a tournament coming up. The Deboss are more active than usual. With all of this happening, Souji finds that he doesn’t have time to think about much of anything, and this allows him to exist without being noticeably more frazzled and grumpy than usual.

But there are moments where Ian will say something that Souji wants to comment back on….that he just doesn’t. Or he pretends he doesn’t hear. Or he just out right calls him a pervert, but it’s off and he’s sure Ian’s noticed. There are lingering touches from King. Honestly, worried looks from Nossan and Amy. And while he’s training in the very brief moments he has, Ucchy tries to start a conversation with him, but Souji finds a reason to be anywhere but there.

He’s not sure if he has words yet to even try to tangle the mess he’s made of his own feelings.

But Ucchy assures him he can talk to him if he needs help, even if its a modern problem he has no clue on. And that….makes Souji consider it. After all, they are both swordsmen, and honestly, they’re both incredibly awkward people as much as Souji hates to even remotely acknowledge it.

So, he finds a time where there’s no Deboss and everyone is mostly busy doing whatever it is they do while he’s at school. This of course means skipping some classes, which has his tally up this year as more classes he’s missed than his whole life time. He’s sure his father will have words about that at some point. He can care about that later.

Ucchy stays in a tent at various underpasses, which seem totally random, but he’s been in this team long enough to actually figure out a general sense of which one he’ll most likely be at. Really, the idea that both him and King are staying in tents living off the land – except for of course the nights that they’re staying at people’s houses – makes him feel a little bad for them. There are plenty of places they could stay. But he knows both of them would refuse any offers for a multitude of reasons.

Souji spends the entire trek to the most popular underpass deep in thought trying to untangle what he should say and what he knows he shouldn’t. How long has this all been going on? The team hadn’t been together that long had it? This had to be a semi recent development. Were people actually flirting with him? Ucchy probably only somewhat knew that one. What was Souji supposed to do? How could Souji curve the ways his emotions made him want to light himself on fire some days if only so the physical sensation was enough to distract him from the way his emotions made him feel?

He was in fact so deep in thought that he hadn’t heard the sounds coming from Ucchy’s tent when he’d gotten in walking distance. In fact, he’d only barely processes the sight in front of him. Which was well…...Ucchy’s ass with had to be King’s fingers digging themselves into his hips – judging by his bracelets. And judging by what little he could see, from Ucchy’s hair covering most of his back, and King’s legs behind him. This was most definitely…Ucchy riding King. In a tent. In a somewhat public space. With the tent not even closed. With neither of them attempting to be quiet.

“K-King-dono...p-please...people...w-will hear”

Okay, with King not caring whether or not people hear them. Ucchy was at least attempting to muffle his moans. It wasn’t really working honestly.

Souji was close enough that he could ….he was too close. Close enough that he could see the bite marks and claw marks, hell the very edge of the condom on King’s dick – at least they were having safe sex? It was probably a lot easier to clean when the nearest source of water was a water fountain.

Ucchy being on top was…a lot. But well, he was riding King, so he supposed he wasn’t technically the one...topping? Souji really didn’t know enough but this sort of thing to piece that out, and really his brain was way too frazzled to even begin to try. All his brain could really do was send out signals about how much he was enjoying this – it was a lot – and how he too would love to be the one riding. Or how he’d love Ucchy to be riding him.

...Anyone riding him would be nice. But why stop there? Who’s to say he could take someone while he was inside someone else even if it wasn’t necessarily riding? What if he took two people – could he handle that? Would that destroy him? According to Amy’s collection of books, with enough lube anything was possible. And quite honestly, if that really were true – and Souji isn’t a fool to think he ever could especially when the most he’s ever taken is a few of his fingers – having maybe three dicks. Did he want to be in control? Did he not want control? Maybe he could suck everyone off..maybe he could--

There’s a rustling of fabric and a thump on the ground that Souji realizes very quickly is Ucchy. Which means they’re finished. Which means that if Souji doesn’t move very, very quickly, he’s going to have to explain why he is incredibly hard in front of their completely exposed tent. And maybe if this was one of Amy’s books, they would invite him in for a round two and they’d both fuck him or something wilder. But this isn’t that. So instead, Souji tries to stuff his hormones in the box he’s desperately tried to put them and and bolts around to hide himself as quickly as possible.

And as soon as he’s far enough away, he slips into an alleyway, leans his back against the wall, and closes his eyes tight. He finds that his eyes are hot with tears and shame. Shame and anxiety. Confusion and maybe fear. Because well….what was he supposed to do? What was his place in all of this? How did he deal with this?

And who the hell was left to talk to because if Souji walked in on another person fucking he was going to scream. Because not only did it make him feel stronger than he wanted to, it made the whole situation...too much.

So he paused looking at the Zakutor battery.

“I really wish you could give me advice, but I think even if you could speak….I think your advice wouldn’t be….”

He might have...looked up how velociraptors mated, and he was incredibly sure that making himself brightly colored, doing some sort of mating dance, and then mounting whoever found him the most attractive was literally...not going to work.

Though, he really wish it would at this rate.

Because…

Because he was going to have to ask Torin.

How many times was he going to have to hear the word brave applied to sex? At least five probably….


	6. Souji has a total meltdown

He’d tried to deal with it himself first. He’d borrowed books from the library, and he’d even done some online research. But these sort of feelings...they didn’t really have words. They didn’t make sense. And he couldn’t untangle them well enough to fit them in a box. Because how did you look up “help my whole team is fucking and in an intricate relationship and I’m jealous but mainly because why am I not involved and it’s making me question my entire purpose on this team and all my friendships because do they like me and I’m just clueless because I don’t understand emotions or do they not want me involved and I’ve read too many of Amy’s mangas to have good idea of how to progress from here”.

3am Souji would say that typing that into google would get back the response of 0 results and google asking him to phrase his search a little better after it fixed all the typos that only a 3am Souji buried in books would manage to make.

5am Souji would hadn’t even gotten enough sleep to function at a normal level would say that honestly he’d welcome the nightmare Deboss again if only if meant he could have an understandable reason why he felt like death warmed over.

Unfortunately, this wasn’t a Deboss problem. This was a him problem. This wasn’t an easy him problem like how he wasn’t good enough with his sword. Or his being a Kyoryuger taking away from his studies. This was a problem that required assistance and talking. And asking for help on things involving talking about his feeling? Not something Souji could really do.

6 am Souji decided that Torin really was the only option and right now was the only time. After all, who would be awake and in the spirit base? Who would be fucking? No one. One would would be fucking at 6 am. Finally, he could walk in and solve his problem without feeling like he was living in some sort of romantic comedy. Or some sort of weird porn? He’s not sure. He’s really not sure he wants to think on it.

He’s also not sure teleporting into the Spirit Base ever made him so nauseous. Or is that his nerves? The world feels vaguely uneven, and he feels vaguely on edge. Maybe its also that he’s been avoiding people for a few days. Avoiding contact except when necessary. Stepping into their shared space, even when he’s sure no one but Torin will be here, feels….dangerous.

“Souji, shouldn’t you be in school…?” Torin speaks and Souji leans against the wall a little as he tries to make his words seem a little less crazy and desperate than he feels.

“...I needed to talk to you.” Without interference. Because, if he walked in on anyone else without this being resolved…..it would be too much.

“….Enough to skip school?” Torin’s tone is serious and Souji can tell there’s more to his statement. Torin is practically all-knowing sometimes, and Souji feels like he can see through him. Souji respects his opinion and judgment more than most people.

“...Why did Zakutor choose me…?” That really isn’t the actual question he wants to ask. But it’s in the same category. It’s close enough. But really, he wonders what he really brings to this team. Sure he’s smart. He’s capable. He’s a talented swordsman. But…..is that enough?

“Is that the question you want to ask…?” Torin starts before turning away to stare off at something majestically. His mustaches blows from a wind that Souji’s not sure where it came from. He’s stopped asking that question weeks ago.

“…No.” Souji starts. “Well...Partially?” He runs his thumb over the battery. “….Am I good enough for everyone here?”

“I think….” Torin turns to him. “You should have more faith in your friend’s feelings. You are all very brave, fantastic warriors. You were all chosen for a reason, and you have all helped each other out often enough. Do you really think all that you have done for them is worthless?”

Souji can’t meet Torin’s eyes. He can’t even look at his battery. His self-esteem issues aren’t….they aren’t his friends fault. He’s not saying his friends' feelings are worthless. He’s not doubting whether or not they love him. Whether or not they care. This isn’t about them.

This is about him. Is that worse though? To be so self-centered to think like that? To care more about his feelings of inadequacy than his friends’ feelings? To get so upset and so out of sorts just because the entire team is fucking without him? Sex isn’t more important than friendship. Than teamwork. Than all of this. But at the same time….

He wants this so bad it hurts. He doesn’t think he’s entitled to it. He’s not that kind of person. If he asked and they told him no, he would hurt, but it wouldn’t destroy their friendship. It wouldn’t destroy them. But it would hurt.

What instead is destroying him is this Schrodinger’s type problem. Because everything is a possibility and also not a possibility until he acts on it. And he wants to without a doubt act on it. But he also doesn’t feel like he understands everything and feelings are so hard. They’re so hard and they’re not concrete. They don’t make sense. It isn’t like swords. If he practices long enough, he’ll get it. The only thing that stops him is his own physical limits. It makes sense. But feelings? There’s so much all the time. Things change all the time. And it’s more than just him.

He wants to be good enough, but he doesn’t want to pressure anyone. He doesn’t want to hurt anyone. He doesn’t want this to be…..

“I….they’re all….they’re all sleeping together without me.” Souji finally manages to choke out. Everything feels lighter and heavier now that he’s said it. “….I’m….not good enough for them, and I can’t make myself better no matter how I try because I’m just a dumb kid and...” He can feel the world tilt. His throat feels tight. His face hot and burning. His stomach twists and everything feels wrong. Everything feels…..pathetic? This is pathetic.

What has he done to try to deal with this? Talk to people and then give up? Avoid people? Continuously judge himself by harsh criteria that he doesn’t hold anyone else to? But if he doesn’t what’s the point? If he isn’t the best, if he isn’t good enough, then what’s the point?

“It is a very brave thing for them to do!” Torin starts, staring off again. “It strengthens the bond between them. And that bond….you want that too don’t you?”

Souji can barely hear his words because he hates himself. Because this situation is so stupid. He could fix this so easily. He could just ask. He could just talk. Because the way they interact that means they probably…..that it’s probably.

But what if it isn’t? Will it destroy their team work if he’s wrong? Defeating the Deboss is more important than this. What if they just pity him because he’s a dumb kid and they don’t want to hurt him?

Isn’t it bad of him to think their love is pity instead of love? Doesn’t even the thought make him a terrible person? A real Kyoryuger would be good enough to not even doubt. To be brave enough to know.

“I...”

And the universe in all of his ways, decides that today truly isn’t Souji’s day.

Because at that moment, Ian entered the spirit base, and Souji tries his best to package his feels back. To cool himself down and wipe the tears from his face. But it’s too late, he’s too far gone. There’s too much to shove back down, and he’s honestly too tired.

“Shouldn’t you be at school….?” There’s no boy or hint of teasing in his voice. There’s a slight edge of concern, which considering Souji’s recent behavior makes perfect sense. Because Souji has been an absolute garbage can.

“….Shouldn’t you be sleeping?” Souji says back, his voice wavering and showing every ounce of his emotional state he doesn’t want to. He refuses to look at Ian, to even show his face. He’s only barely keeping himself together over something he’s sure he’s blown way out of proportion.

“I had some things I was going to work on….” Ian starts, and Souji can feel the frown in his voice.

“...I just needed to ask Torin something before school. It’’s fine. I’m fine.” The words feel like lead. Heavy and refusing to leave his mouth. He has no idea what he wants or how to deal with things. This is easily fixed isn’t it? He just has to talk.

Souji only manages a few steps before he feels Ian’s hand on his shoulder.

“Hey...I’m worried about you.” And Souji can feel his whole body tense up at that. He hates himself more. This is ridiculous. He’s made all of this ridiculous. “...You know you can talk to us...to me about anything right? We’re a team.”

And he feels anxiety like an angry hot sludge rise from the pit of his stomach, as he turns and opens his mouth.

“Like you all talk to me about what’s going on with all of you?!” His voice is louder than he means it. Unstable. He hates himself more. There’s no reason to talk to Ian like that. He’s trying to help. This is entirely Souji’s own problem. But he’s too tired to get his brain to work logically. In fact, he doesn’t even feel like he’s in his own skin. Like he’s watching his emotions kick him out of the driver’s seat and crash the car.

Souji can barely register the confusion on Ian’s face. “...What are you-”

“No. Don’t play dumb. All of you. You’re all. Together. Everyone without me! And I know. I know I’m just some dumb kid. I know I'm not good enough. I know there are so many other people who could take my place and be ten times better than me. I know! But you could….at least…..have…..” He’s shaking now. He tries to hit the brake, to stop. But it’s too late….All the words just come out. “Have told me!”

“Souji, it’s not like that. Listen, we-”

“What would you understand anyway?! All of this stuff just comes naturally to you. It’s effortless. You don’t….” Stop. Stop. Souji has to stop. He has to. He doesn’t mean anything he’s saying. Sure, Ian is Ian, but even he knows it’s more than that. This is wrong. He doesn’t mean this.

And world continues to just play out in exactly the way Souji can’t deal because the second he feels like he’s going to puke...the rest of the team shows up. And all of their concerned faces make the guilt unbearable.

“….Souji…?” Amy starts, already having seen him have a total meltdown once before on one of his days he really wasn’t proud about.

It’s too much. He can’t do that. He can’t do any of this.

So he runs as fast as he can, pushing past, and teleports out of the base. He doesn’t stop running until he’s home, grateful that at least his father will be busy all day for once in his life.

His body, numb, takes him to the dojo. He takes his bokken in his hands. And he does what he always does when he doesn’t want to think.

He trains.

Because this is all he knows.

...He doesn’t know anything else anymore.

...Where does he go from here?


	7. Souji still doesn't fuck in this chapter I'm sorry

Souji has no idea how much time has passed. He really doesn’t. It could have been hours. Maybe longer, maybe less. He’s sprawled out on the dojo floor, grateful that his father is no where in sight. Grateful to be alone. His heart is pounding in his ears and his bokken is just slightly out of reach. Enough that maybe he could twist and grab it and keep going. Just like everything in his life. Just out of reach but just in reach. Something he could attain and do if he just did it without worrying about things for once in his life.

If Souji used his words instead of avoiding his problems. If Souji actually reached out instead of internalizing. Hadn’t he chastised other’s for doing the same thing? But following his own advice was hard...he wasn’t like the others. That was the reason wasn’t it? He was just different enough that it was a problem. Everyone else had something to tie them all together and he felt like that thread was just out of reach. But maybe just in reach? If he just….tried.

Putting his arm over his eyes, he took a deep breath. All he had to do was try. All he had to do was ask. All he had to do was move forward. He wasn’t terrible at this, but why was this so hard? Was it because he was terrified of losing what had become more important to him than anything else? Could he really just waltz in after blowing up at Ian and confess the depth of why he was upset? Upset over being left out? Over his own inexperience and short comings? Over his in--

There was...a feeling like something...someone was above him. Souji shifted his arm downwards to be eye to eye with….

“Hey Souji!” King started as Souji let out an ungraceful yelp and nearly smacked heads with him, sitting up before quickly springing to his feet. When the hell had he gotten in the room? How had he gotten so close? King was the least quiet person he knew. To let him sneak up on him.

But he’s done a lot of things lately that aren’t like him. It’s frustrating. And to have King here, to come get him? When he doesn’t deserve it? He can feel the tears well up in his eyes. His anxiety pool in his stomach, digging itself further and further. Souji clenches his teeth, grinding them against each other in an attempt to stop his tears. In an attempt to ground himself and pull his feelings into something.

“I’m sorry.” Souji starts, refusing to make eye contact. “I’m sorry. I yelled at Ian. I was rude to everyone. I let my emotions get the best of me. I was stupidly jealous because I wasn’t included when it was me who removed myself from everything.” The words flow from him, just as tears flow from his eyes. Against his will entirely. He tries to breathe. He tries to stop. But nothing does. He can barely see through his own tears. “I hurt everyone. I’m bad at feelings and people and I’m just a stupid inexperienced kid wh-”

There’s a tug against his collar pulling him hard into King. His lips smash against King’s lips hard and messily. Souji’s hand come up, confused and uncertain, trying to stabilize himself by grabbing onto King’s vest. There’s a yelp that comes from his lips that is just enough for King to take advantage.

For a moment, Souji thinks he might have passed out and this is just a dream. Because he doesn’t deserve this.

And then King bites hard enough on his lower lip to draw blood. The taste is enough to get him past his own shock. And in one quick motion, he’s got a hand buried in King’s hair and another shifted down to his waist pulling him closer. Souji drags his tongue over King’s bottom lip and bites down nearly as hard as he did. And the second King’s tongue moves out to meet his, Souji nips at it, before sucking hard.

And just like that. A part of his anxiety dissolves. And it’s replaced with gnashing of teeth and biting and nails against skin and finally after a few moments, Souji pulls away, dragging his tongue over his own lips which throb and sting. His breath irregular and quick. His eyes wide and starry. His face probably red enough to match King’s vest honestly.

“….Wh….what.”

“Man, Souji if that was all you needed to calm down you should have asked weeks ago!” King wraps an arm around his shoulder and Souji’s brain starts to go into overdrive on that. What he needed to calm down? Was that just a way to get him to chill?

“...I don’t need your...I don’t deserve. Don’t do that just because...” His eyes are teary again and he can feel shame and frustration puddle inside him where anxiety had taken root earlier. King’s smile quickly turns to a look of concern and...something he can’t place.

“You know me better than that.” King starts. His tone is...Souji feels his stomach twist hard. It’s not one he likes to hear from him. “I don’t just kiss anyone, you know? You’re a member of the team!”

“….That’s...” Souji tries to wrap his head around the situation. The rapid shift of emotions makes him feel dizzy and unsettled. And he’s not sure he even knows what to do anymore. “I don’t want anyone to do anything they don’t want to do.”

“You think I didn’t want to kiss you?” King leans in, giving him a look like he’s asking him if T-rex’s have teeth. Souji feels like even that question is smarter than anything that’s come out of his mouth in weeks.

“….I….didn’t want to assume...” Souji starts looking to the side.

“What’s there to assume? And you could….just ask you know? We’re all here for you.” King places his hand on his back and Souji leans into the touch. “We’re a team aren’t we? We’re all here for each other!” And Souji feels even stupider than he did a few moments ago. He’s made this situation ridiculous.

“...I just…..I saw Amy and Ucchy….and then you and Ian...and then you and Ian and Nobu….And then you and Ucchy...and I….” Souji starts again, burying his face in King’s shoulder. “...I didn’t see a place for me in that. I didn’t think I’d ever fit in. None of you told me about any of it...and I…figured none of you wanted me in it. Because I’m dumb and inexperienced and-”

King’s lips cut him off again. “You sell yourself short, you know? I’m not gonna listen to you insult yourself again. I’ll just have to kiss you every time you do.” King grins, a full flash of teeth. Souji finds himself heating up and looking to the side.

“...in some ways that only encourages me to do so….” Souji mumbles just loud enough for King to hear apparently because he laughs.

“You don’t need to insult yourself to get me to kiss you. Or anyone for that matter. Ian’s been trying for awhile now. Just thought you weren’t interested considering you kept ignoring him.” King nods as he says that and Souji wants to retort about why should he take any of Ian’s advances seriously when he’s Ian of all people. But….looking back there’s more to it than he’s given credit probably.

“...Ian flirts with everybody.” Souji does manage to mumble. “What about Nobu? Or Amy? Or Ucchy?” It’s not like everybody has been flirting with him. It’s not like he’s THAT clueless about love right?

….or maybe he is. Souji’s terrible at this.

“Welllll” King starts pausing to think. “I know Nobu didn’t want to push you or make you feel uncomfortable considering his age. Amy didn’t know whether you were interested in girls or not considering you only read her Yaoi Manga.” Souji blinks a few times trying to process that Amy apparently discussed his reading habits with everyone...and considering some of what he read…..That was embarrassment to unpack later. “And Ucchy is Ucchy. He’s even worse than you are at this!”

“….Really?” Souji frowned, not sure if he really believed all of that.

“Yeah! He’s always gets super embarrassed about-” King starts and Souji knows that he needs to stop him immediately or he’s going to hear a recount of them fucking in the tent through King’s point of view. Which is honestly, not something he’s even remotely ready for.

“No! I meant. Everyone...actually….?” Souji starts, not knowing how to put words in order to even remotely express what he’s feeling.

“Oh yeah! Come on, you can ask them yourself!” King says before grabbing his hand and yanking him back to the Spirit base before he can even remotely say no.

“Wait. Wait. King. I can’t just…..I can’t just ask people if they like me and if they’d want to make out!” Souji sputters trying to dig his heels into the ground. But King is not someone you can stop when his mind is set on something and somehow he manages to drag Souji effortless forward with a strength that is both impressive and vaguely terrifying.

King stops. He turns to Souji, and he blinks, pausing for a moment.

“Why not?” It’s said in such a tone that Souji really wants to know where King gets his confidence from because Souji would like some of it honestly.

“Because...Because. Feelings are complicated. And what if they don’t? What if you’re wrong? What if-” Souji tries to step backwards. To run. Because this is a lot and he doesn’t even know where to begin.

“I’m never wrong!” King declared cheerfully, and really, Souji wasn’t sure he could think of a time where he was. Though, he paused before starting again. “Well, maybe I’ve been wrong once or twice. But I’m definitely not wrong on this! Besides, if you do nothing, then it’s even worse right? No progress because you didn’t try is way worse than no progress because you failed, right?”

King knows him better than he knows himself sometimes.

“…..Yeah. But-”

“No buts!” King grins and somehow they’re in front of the entrance to the spirit base.

Wait. How did they get here? Weren’t they just at the dojo? He wasn’t ready for this.

And just like that he’s standing at the entrance. All eyes on him.

 


End file.
